An Open Letter To My Crazy Ex

I am tired of you calling my house trying to reach me, I have caller-id do you really think I'll pick up? You have "bumped" into me at my own work, where you know I can't escape your gaze, you have just happened to take a walk down my street when you knew I was home.

You have sent me long text messages asking to get back with you, to forgive you, to let everything go back to the way it was. Did you not understand that I don't want to be with a cheater and a liar?
You have lost all of my trust, you have tried to sabotage any attempt I have made at meeting someone new, you are bat-shit crazy.

Do you not get that once we stopped talking two years ago that we were never going to start talking again? I do not want to revisit the "romance" we once had, the times when you burped in my face, and had your mom drive us because you forgot to pay your car insurance.

No I do not want to see you when I'm working. No I do not want to read long e-mails and texts saying how you made a mistake by sleeping around and treating me so badly. No I do not want to take a walk with you to remember the good days. No I do not want to receive messages saying how you think I'm beautiful because you're getting to be border line creepy.

I gave up on our relationship over two years ago, but you can't get it through your head. I have moved on and so should you. I've changed my number and e-mail address, and won't answer you no matter what. I memorized your numbers so I never have to pick up another call from you.

Please grow up and get a life that does not revolve around me.

Signed,
Your Pissed Off Ex-Girlfriend

Picture taken from: http://www.foxnews.com/images/488161/0_61_text_message.jpg

Meeting the Parents

So you've been dating someone for awhile now, depending on how old you are this could be a few months, weeks, or longer. But sooner or later you have to meet your boyfriend/girlfriend's parents. This is the dreaded process of awkward hello's, and just a general feeling of uncomfortableness. You are suddenly just as nervous as you were for the first date, but now you are being sized up and judged by these people who are more than likely rather intimidating.
This process is nerve racking, you might sweat profusely, talk faster than normal, bounce your leg while you sit, or maybe you get shy and just freeze up. Relax. Although this experience is scary for almost everyone you need to try to keep calm and maintain a cool composure. First impressions stick with parents and if you are dating their son or daughter you need to show them that you are the person that can make their child happy. Just use your manners and be polite, throw in a sir or miss, never call them by their first name unless they've said that it is okay to do so. You don't want to be too informal the first time you meet them.


Don't shake hands like this

Before you meet them think of things to talk about, perhaps mention the nice decor of the house, or how you hear that they love to go hiking. Having something to talk about not only breaks the ice but shows that you took interest in them and therefore listened to what their son or daughter had to say about them.
Don't get all tense when meeting the parents for the first time, because each time you see them after will only get easier and easier. So inhale slowly, pop an Altoid into your mouth, and put on some extra deodorant.

Photo taken from: http://wrestlingthehyperbole.files.wordpress.com/2009/03/superstock_255-247341.jpg

5 Things You Shouldn't Do On a Social Networking Site

Nowadays it seems as though everyone has a Facebook, Twitter, Formspringme, and or a Tumblr. These sites are just a way to fill up the free time in our day to day life. As entertaining and time consuming these social networking sites may be detrimental to your “real” social life.

1. Don’t Answer Questions You Aren’t Comfortable With
This mostly relates to the Formspringme website, http://www.formspring.me/, where anyone can sign up for it so that their friends or random people can ask them questions. This can be totally anonymous so people seem to feel a bit risky when it comes to asking questions. What most people don’t quite get is that just because they are asked an inappropriate question such as how often they have sex, or how often they masturbate (yes people have asked these questions, cause you know we’re on a need-to-know basis)but you don’t need to answer this. Ever. You can simply delete the question and never answer it, but if you do answer it either jokingly or not you are putting that on your little internet identity forever. Since most anyone can find you on Formspringme this leaves possible future dating partners aware of things about you that you may not have wanted them to know. Here’s a hint if it isn’t a comfortable question/topic for you don’t feel the need to answer it.

2. Don’t Update Your Status Every 5 Minutes
No one cares what sandwich you ate at lunch, or how bored you are because no one is around. Think about this; if you are trying to date someone and they see that you update your status on Facebook or on Twitter every minute of every day they will see you have nothing to do, or that you are totally obsessed with sitting at your computer and they won’t want to go out to get to know you. Instead of locking yourself up in your room and letting everyone on your friend’s list see that you clearly have nothing better to do with your life shows them you have no interests. If you like to go outside, go outside but don’t tell everyone you are going outside, just do it.

3. Don’t Confess Things on Tumblr Only to Deny it on Formspringme
This seems fairly obvious, especially if you are linking your Tumblr account to your Formspring page but I know someone who has done this. If you are allowing people to see your Tumblr account and they can read anything you write there, assume that they are. And if these people are reading that, it also means that they are probably reading the answers you are giving on Formspringme. For example if you tell everyone on Formspringme you were really heartbroken about your ex breaking up with you, don’t make a post on Tumblr saying that you only dated that person to get close to one of their friends. By contradicting yourself it makes your friends, and a possible future boyfriend/girlfriend see that you are not a totally honest person. You can’t say one thing on one website and something totally different on another website. Since anyone can access these pages you need to just watch what you say on both, you cannot have multiple identities when you are linking everything back together.

4. Don’t Tell Everyone Where You Are Going
This relates to step 2 of not constantly updating your status or Twitter account, however you also need to ensure that you are not telling people exact locations and/or addresses of the places you are going to. You should not let everyone in the free world know exactly where you are, it is almost inviting people to find you, or to simply rob your house if you are not home and telling everyone that you aren’t there.

5. Beware of Pictures
Make sure that whatever pictures you have on Facebook are pictures you want everyone to see. These sites can be viewed by future employers or by future mates. If it is embarrassing, or detrimental to your future career or dating life try not to post it. That means that you should probably not put up pictures that show you are begging for attention such as no shirt pictures or with you wearing skimpy clothing in front of a mirror. These pictures show no class and are very tasteless. Show who you really are not who you are trying to be.

Just beware of what you post online, it can affect your future. If you are single make sure to show you are available but not desperate. Don’t be glued to technology everyday of your life or you will seem like a loner and no one will really want to date someone who is already in a relationship with their computer.

image taken from: http://digitisation.jiscinvolve.org/files/2009/06/social_networking_sites.jpg